134+ Newspaper Puns That’ll Make You Laugh Out Loud

Puns are an age-old form of humor that continues to bring smiles and chuckles to people of all ages.

They’re the perfect blend of cleverness, wit, and wordplay that can turn any dull moment into an amusing one.

If you’re looking for a collection of hilarious newspaper-related puns, you’re in the right place.

With 138 newspaper puns, you’ll have enough jokes to keep the newsroom buzzing and your friends giggling for hours.

These puns aren’t just clever—they’re the kind of jokes that’ll make you feel like the headline of a comedy show!

Newspaper Puns

1. Headline Humor

  1. I used to be a newspaper editor, but I just couldn’t handle the pressure of making headlines.
  2. I was going to start a newspaper about paper, but it didn’t have enough content.
  3. Why did the newspaper go to therapy? It had too many issues.
  4. Breaking news: The local bakery is having a ‘dough’ dilemma.
  5. Why did the reporter bring a pencil to the interview? To draw conclusions.

2. Ink and Printing Puns

  1. I love working in a printing press. It’s a lot of fun, but sometimes I get ink-redibly stressed.
  2. What do you call a writer who’s always covered in ink? A true pro-press-ional.
  3. I tried to start a newspaper for birds, but it never took off.
  4. I wrote an article about printers once, but it was just a printout of ideas.
  5. The printer broke down after printing a whole newspaper, but it was just a ‘pressing’ matter.

3. Journalism Jokes

  1. What’s the favorite drink of a journalist? A ‘press’ed coffee.
  2. Journalists are like good puns—always making headlines.
  3. Why did the journalist bring a ladder to work? To reach new heights in reporting.
  4. Why don’t journalists ever get lost? They always follow the lead.
  5. A journalist’s favorite exercise? Press-ups.

4. Newspaper Delivery Puns

  1. I used to deliver newspapers, but I was just too tired.
  2. The newspaper delivery guy quit his job—it was too much of a ‘pressing’ responsibility.
  3. I’ve decided to deliver newspapers part-time… it’s just a ‘paper’ trail I can follow.
  4. When the newspaper delivery guy couldn’t find my house, it was a ‘printable’ disaster.
  5. The newspaper boy delivered the news but never took the ‘paper’ route.

5. Editorial and Column Puns

  1. I’m thinking of writing a column about gardening. I’d call it “The Root of the Matter.”
  2. Why did the columnist get kicked out of school? Too many ‘pen’alties.
  3. The editor always said, “If you don’t like the news, write your own column!”
  4. I had a column once, but it was a bit of a ‘loose page’ situation.
  5. Columnists love their jobs because they’re always in ‘print’able form.

6. Newspaper Editors Puns

  1. The editor got a promotion—now he’s in ‘charge of the headlines’.
  2. The editor couldn’t handle all the bad stories—they were ‘drafting’ him crazy!
  3. Being an editor is great because you’re always ‘in the know’.
  4. Editors love their work. It’s a real ‘cut and paste’ job.
  5. The editor had to rewrite the article, but he was ‘cut off’ mid-sentence.

7. Breaking News Puns

  1. Breaking news: I just found out I’m allergic to newspapers! It’s a real ‘paper rash’.
  2. Breaking news: The coffee machine in the office is a real ‘brew-ha-ha’!
  3. Breaking news: I lost my job at the bakery; apparently, I wasn’t ‘breading’ the right way.
  4. Breaking news: Local gym’s attendance is down—people are ‘pressing’ their luck with other exercises.
  5. Breaking news: A cat opened a newspaper stand. Now it’s a ‘purr-ess’ business.

8. Newspaper Wordplay Puns

Newspaper Wordplay Puns
  1. Did you hear about the scandal at the printer? It was quite a ‘pressing’ issue.
  2. The headline read, “Puns are great for news stories!”—I was ‘pun-der’whelmed.
  3. I once wrote a headline about paperclips—it was really ‘clip’-ical.
  4. Newspapers are like pizza—they both have a lot of ‘dough’ behind them.
  5. The headline of the party was “It’s Paper, Not Plastic!”

9. Comic Strip Puns

  1. I’m drawing a blank here, but at least it’s in the comic section.
  2. I think the comic strips are ‘laughing’ at us.
  3. I tried drawing a comic for the paper, but I couldn’t ‘sketch’ a good story.
  4. The comic character was so funny, he made the entire page ‘pop’ with laughter.
  5. Why was the comic strip so popular? It had good ‘panel’ discussion.

10. Local News Puns

  1. Did you hear the local bakery is making headlines? They’re ‘baking’ news every day!
  2. Local paper was criticized for writing a ‘biased’ report on weather. It was definitely ‘clouded’ news.
  3. The local news station ran a story about a haunted house… now that’s a real ‘spooky’ headline!
  4. The local restaurant was in the newspaper for its new ‘meaty’ story.
  5. Our local news loves a good scoop—except when they forget their spoons!

11. Newspaper Subscription Puns

  1. I subscribed to a newspaper about fences… it’s called ‘The Gatekeeper’.
  2. I tried subscribing to a comedy newspaper, but the puns were too ‘pressing’ for me.
  3. A friend once told me to get a subscription to ‘The Daily Grind’—so I did!
  4. I got a subscription to a newspaper for chefs—it’s called ‘The Stir’.
  5. My newspaper subscription is up, so I guess it’s ‘time to unsubscribe’.

12. Newspaper Layout Puns

  1. Designers are like magicians—watch them ‘layout’ the story in front of your eyes.
  2. They say a good layout is key to success, but I’m just trying to ‘align’ with my audience.
  3. I tried to lay out a newspaper article once, but it was ‘out of page’.
  4. A good layout? It’s all about ‘balance’ and proper ‘spacing’.
  5. Newspapers love a good ‘column’—they’re always looking for the right ‘align-ment’.

13. Newspaper Fonts and Typeface Puns

  1. Font jokes are great, but you’ve got to be careful—some are just too ‘bold’.
  2. A designer told me they were tired of their work. I guess they just needed a ‘serif’ break.
  3. I asked the font designer about a project, but he said it was too ‘italic’.
  4. The newspaper’s headlines were written in bold—now that’s ‘font-tastic’!
  5. The font choices in the newspaper were a real ‘type’ of fun.

14. Old Newspapers Puns

  1. I found an old newspaper about dinosaurs… it was ‘prehistoric’!
  2. The old newspaper was full of outdated headlines—they were ‘past their prime’.
  3. I got an old edition of the paper—it was ‘news from the past’.
  4. Why did the old newspaper go to therapy? It had too much ‘baggage’.
  5. The historic newspaper had some ‘aged’ puns—talk about classic humor!

15. Funny News Anchors Puns

  1. The news anchor had a great ‘reporting’ career but was always ‘interviewing’ new puns.
  2. Why did the news anchor cross the road? To get to the ‘other headline’.
  3. You can always count on a news anchor for ‘breaking’ jokes.
  4. News anchors should be more careful—they tend to ‘anchor’ jokes that are too dry.
  5. I tried becoming a news anchor, but I couldn’t ‘hold the mic’ long enough for the punchlines.

16. Editorial Cartoons Puns

  1. Editorial cartoons are like jokes—they draw a ‘line’ between humor and truth.
  2. The cartoonist drew a political joke—it was quite the ‘sketchy’ situation.
  3. I asked the cartoonist for a funny story—he said, “Just wait for the ‘punchline’.”
  4. Editorial cartoons are always filled with ‘toons’ of humor.
  5. I love political cartoons—they always have a ‘point’ to make.

17. Newspaper Criticism Puns

Newspaper Criticism Puns
  1. I received a bad review from the newspaper. I guess it was a ‘cut’ above the rest.
  2. Why did the critic refuse to review a newspaper? It just didn’t have the ‘write’ stuff.
  3. The critic’s review of the news article was ‘too harsh’—he was clearly ‘cutting’ it too close.
  4. The newspaper critic had a lot to say… mostly just ‘paper-thin’ complaints.
  5. When the critic panned the article, the writer ‘brushed it off’.

18. Magazine vs. Newspaper Puns

  1. Why did the newspaper break up with the magazine? They couldn’t handle each other’s ‘spreads’.
  2. The magazine was jealous of the newspaper’s ‘front page’ appeal.
  3. The magazine tried to sell its stories, but the newspaper was always better at ‘getting the scoop’.
  4. Magazines are like fine art—newspapers are just about ‘getting the picture’.
  5. I love magazines, but newspapers are where the ‘headlines’ really matter.

19. Newspaper Subscription Service Puns

  1. I tried to cancel my newspaper subscription, but they wouldn’t ‘let me off the hook’.
  2. The newspaper subscription had a great deal—it was a real ‘paper’ trail!
  3. I got a subscription to a math newspaper, and now I’m really ‘counting’ on the news.
  4. I got a subscription to a gardening newspaper—it really ‘planted’ some good ideas in my head.
  5. They offered me a deal on a subscription, but I couldn’t decide—I guess it was a ‘pressing’ matter.

20. Newspaper and Technology Puns

  1. I tried reading the news online, but I missed the good ‘print’.
  2. Newspapers and technology are like oil and water—they just don’t ‘mix’ well.
  3. I tried reading the news on a tablet, but it just felt too ‘digital’.
  4. The newspaper’s new app was great, but it was still stuck in the ‘pressing’ times.
  5. I love the newspaper, but sometimes the technology makes me feel ‘old-school’.

21. Journalism School Puns

  1. I graduated from journalism school, but it’s still ‘writing’ me up for mistakes.
  2. I went to journalism school and learned that the best headlines are always ‘written’ in stone.
  3. Why did the journalism student bring a pencil? To ‘draw’ conclusions.
  4. I studied journalism, but I couldn’t handle the ‘press’ure.
  5. The journalist was so bad, even his coffee break made the headlines—what a ‘brew’ to remember.

22. Newspaper Cartoons Puns

  1. Cartoons in the newspaper are great—they always ‘draw’ a crowd.
  2. I read a political cartoon today, and it was ‘sketchy’ at best.
  3. The cartoonist’s new piece? It was an ‘art’ form at its finest.
  4. Newspaper cartoons are full of laughs—but you really need to ‘read between the lines’.
  5. Why did the cartoonist quit? They didn’t have the ‘draw’ to keep it going.

23. Newspaper Paperweight Puns

  1. I used to use my newspaper as a paperweight, but now it just holds ‘pressing’ issues.
  2. The newspaper didn’t work as a paperweight—it kept ‘falling’ apart.
  3. I needed a heavy-duty paperweight, so I grabbed an old edition—talk about ‘pressing’ matters.
  4. Newspapers are great for paperweights—especially when you need to ‘hold things down’.
  5. If you ever lose your paperweight, just grab a ‘news-worthy’ edition.

24. Newspaper Nostalgia Puns

  1. I miss the days of printing presses. It was so much ‘press’ure, but worth it.
  2. Newspapers used to be my life, but now they’re just ‘archived’ memories.
  3. I found an old newspaper in my attic, and I had to ‘dust’ off some memories.
  4. I miss reading the paper in the morning, it had a real ‘newspaper’ charm.
  5. The old paper’s headlines? They were ‘printed’ on my mind.

25. News Coverage Puns

  1. I covered the story about a missing pencil—it was the perfect ‘lead’ story.
  2. The reporter gave ‘breaking’ news coverage—but it was just about a broken coffee pot.
  3. I was covering a huge event, but all I got was ‘off the record’.
  4. The coverage was great, but it was a real ‘tight-lipped’ situation.
  5. The story had all the elements: suspense, mystery, and an ‘undercover’ plot.

26. International Newspaper Puns

  1. I tried to read a foreign newspaper, but I couldn’t ‘translate’ the puns.
  2. An international edition of the paper? It’s a real ‘global’ affair.
  3. I subscribed to an international paper, but I just couldn’t ‘wrap my head’ around the news.
  4. Reading international news is like having a ‘passport’ for your mind.
  5. The international newspaper was full of travel news—it’s a real ‘tourist trap’ of stories.

27. Satirical Newspaper Puns

  1. The satirical newspaper is the best—it’s always ‘punny’.
  2. Satirical papers are so good at making fun of the news—they’ve got ‘sarcasm’ covered.
  3. The satirical paper made me laugh, but I didn’t know if it was ‘real’ or just ‘mock’ journalism.
  4. Satirical writers can take any news and make it ‘fictional’.
  5. I love the satirical paper—it’s full of ‘pun’-ishing humor.

28. Newspaper Headline Puns

  1. The headline read “Newspaper Gone Bad”—it was a real ‘tearable’ story.
  2. The headline said “Breaking News: Puns Are Everywhere”—and that’s no ‘joke’.
  3. Did you see the headline? It was a ‘real hit’ on the newsstand.

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